The number of lonely men is on the rise
It's no secret that men are often the loneliest people in the world.
This isn't a new phenomenon either; it's been happening for years, but few men talk about it. Why? We're just not very good at expressing our feelings and emotions.
Men are taught from an early age that "real men" don't cry or show weakness, so instead of talking about the problems, we tend to internalize them until they become too much to handle. And then we snap...
That's why suicide rates among men are higher than women - emotional numbness doesn't work forever, and eventually, something will break into consciousness whether you want it there!
Isolation, loneliness, and a lack of community are rife among men today.
The first step to combatting loneliness is recognizing it. Isolation, loneliness, and a lack of community are rife among men today. Research shows that men are more likely to be lonely than women, which can severely affect their mental health. Lonely men are more likely to be depressed, anxious, and have substance abuse problems; they're also less likely to have a partner or children.
The number of single men has increased since 1950 because fewer people get married as they age - but there's also been an increase in male divorce rates over time (although these numbers have leveled off recently).
The good news is that you can change your life by making small changes today!
How does loneliness affect men?
The first thing to understand is that loneliness is a real, serious problem. It can be as harmful to your health as smoking or lack of exercise, linked to depression, anxiety, substance abuse, and suicide.
Loneliness isn't just about not having anyone around: it's also about feeling disconnected from the world around you. If you're lonely, even if there are people around who seem friendly or willing to talk with you, those interactions may not feel meaningful--or they might even make matters worse by reminding you how isolated and disconnected you are from others' lives (and thus their experiences) that makes them feel.
The problem with being a man in this situation is that you don't want to discuss it.
The problem with being a man in this situation is that you don't want to discuss it.
We're socialized from an early age not to show weakness or vulnerability, so we often go our whole lives without opening up about our feelings and needs. If you remember your childhood, how often did someone tell you, "Boys don't cry"?
Or perhaps they said something like "man up," which implies that expressing emotion is somehow less masculine than bottling it up inside yourself until it explodes out of control (if at all). As adults, most men still aren't comfortable talking about their emotions--even if they're sad or lonely--because society tells them that doing so means they aren't being tough enough.
What to do about it - Build trust with your closest male friends.
When building trust in relationships, men need to get out of their comfort zone. This can be difficult if you're not used to talking about your feelings with others or don't have close male friends who know what it's like for you. But with a little effort and practice (and maybe some coaching), it will become easier over time.
The key is being honest with yourself when something makes you feel vulnerable and honest with others when they make themselves vulnerable too! We all want our closest relationships to be open and straightforward; however, sometimes, we may not realize that we need more vulnerability until someone else points it out for us or permits us through their example.
That's where coaching comes in: Coaches help clients build trust by modeling vulnerability during sessions together so clients learn how effective communication works between two people when each person feels safe enough within themselves and safe enough around each other.
Learn how to be honest about your feelings.
One of the biggest reasons men don't talk about their feelings is because they're afraid of being judged, criticized, or told that their feelings aren't valid.
It's okay not to be okay sometimes, and you need to learn how to express yourself honestly, even when it might make you look weak or irrational. You should also never feel ashamed for needing help sometimes (and asking for it).
The best way forward is by learning how to communicate with friends and loved ones without letting ego get in the form of progress; because if there's anything more painful than loneliness itself, it's seeing someone close-up who could use some help but won't ask for it because he thinks he doesn't deserve any sympathy at all.
Make time for yourself.
The first step to finding time for yourself is asking yourself what you enjoy doing. If you're unsure, think back on the things that made you happy in the past and list them. Then try out some new things! Once you've got a few activities in mind, try scheduling some time into your week for these activities.
Finding time for yourself can be challenging when so many other responsibilities are competing for it--schoolwork, work, and family obligations all compete with our own needs and interests. But ultimately, it's worth making an effort because keeping busy can be exhausting at times (and even counterproductive).
So how do we balance all these responsibilities while still making room for ourselves? The key lies in being realistic about what kind of schedule works best for us as individuals; if someone needs more sleep than another person, they probably shouldn't plan anything too late at night because otherwise, they'll end up feeling exhausted instead of refreshed!
It's okay to be vulnerable; it's okay to ask for help; it's okay not to be okay sometimes.
It's okay to be vulnerable; it's okay to ask for help; it's okay not to be okay sometimes.
We're all human, which means we all have moments when we need help or support from others. It's not always easy to reach out, especially when you're used to being independent and self-reliant--but it can make all the difference in your life if you do so anyway!
Conclusion
Loneliness is a feeling that everyone experiences at some point in their lives, but it is especially difficult for men. We often think that if we show vulnerability or ask for help, we will be seen as weak or less masculine. But this couldn't be further from the truth! It takes courage to seek out someone else when you're feeling alone--and it shows just how strong and brave we can be when faced with adversity.
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